The Badass of the Week.

On Badasses and Heroes

I always enjoy getting Badass of the Week nominations from fans, even though I receive about three or four a day and I'll never be able to get around to writing about everything that people ask me to.  However, there are quite a few nominations I receive that I won't write about on this site simply out of principle.  The following e-mail is a good example of this, and I've decided to use it (with permission) to illustrate a point.

First off let me say I love your articles they're so awesome especially the articles about ancient warriors.  That said I would like to tell you about the most hard-ass mother fucker to ever walk the planet.  I'm sure you get suggestions all the time but this one I think is pretty neat.  Let me first say I'm not a big religion fanatic nor have I offered this suggestion because of my beliefs, religion just happens to be a part of it.  On April 20th, 1999 some dick-headed mother fuckers thought it would be cool to walk into a school a shoot the place up.  On girl was sitting in the library, this girl was a quiet girl but she was a very well known Christian but she also happened to be the most hard-ass mother fucker on the planet.  Think of this, in the past your badass's have shot people or stabbed people or generally tore shit up, now any mother fucker can come along and tear shit up.  But it takes a special breed of badass to have a fucking TEC-9 pointed at their head and have some fuck stick putting their life in their hands and them having the dump truck sized brass balls to stand up for what they believe in even if it mean losing their life.  Think about could you sit there knowing the sentence your about to deliver is going to take your life.  Could you do that at the age of 17?  This has absolutly nothing to do with religion but it has everything to do with being a hardcore badass.  My official nomination: Cassie Bernall.  Even if you don't post her as a badass of the week I would like to hear back what you think of my nomination.

Thanks, Josh

In case you didn't click on the Wikipedia links, Cassie Bernall was one of the students killed during the Colombine High School massacre in 1999.  Klebold and Harris pointed a gun at her, asked her point blank whether or not she believed in God, and when she responded "yes" they killed her.  I very much agree that it takes a lot of guts and badassery to stand up for what you believe in while facing certain death, though I don't think it's really super appropriate for me to post about people like Cassie on the Badass of the Week.  I feel like with some people, mostly those I would describe as "heroes" rather than just "badasses", it would be unfair to their memory for me to write a comedy article about them and post their names on a list that features characters like King Kong, Han Solo and Optimus Prime.  Cassie Bernall, the passengers of United Flight 93 on 9/11, Quang Duc in Vietnam, Rosa Robota in the uprising at Aushwitz... I just don't think I would do these peoples' memories justice by writing humorous articles about their heroic actions.  So while I always enjoy hearing peoples' suggestions for Badasses of the Week, just remember that 90% of the content on this site is jokes about D&D and penises and that's not always the best way to remember heroic martyrs.


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