The Badass of the Week.

E-Mail: Battle Golf

First off I would like to say great site your writing style is rather unique I would say. But last weekend I read about the so called sport of Battle Golf and I new from the moment I read that article I was destined to play it.It all started out wednesday when me and a few buddies were off roading his Explorer and while at the car wash cleaning it from the muddy mess I noticed a set of golf clubs,his paintball marker, and a few footballs, and of course a red ryder bb gun. After seeing all this I knew what I had to bring up. I told my buddy about the sport of battlegolf and after a few minutes of debating we decided to get the crew together on his fathers golf course.we all met up at the course around 7 pm and as truck after truck pulled up we had roughly 3 teams of 5 players each all armed to the teeth with bb guns, airsoft guns, paintball markers, tennis balls, footballs, boxing gloves and a childs set of night vision goggles. after grouping up we had the following teams:  

Team Roid Rage
golfer=golf club and a high powered gas uzi airsoft gun
caddy 1=boxing gloves
caddy 2=modified red ryder with scope and children NV gogs
caddy 3 =backpack of tennis balls
caddy 4=ICD promaster paintball marker
 

Team imperial justice
golfer=golf club
caddy 1=airsoft gun
caddy 2=airsoft gun
caddy 3=paintball marker+ air horn
caddy 4=whiffle (sp?) ball bat
 

Team  strong salamis
golfer= golfclub + life vest
caddy 1=nothing
caddy 2=airsoft gun
caddy 3=bicycle and large stick
caddy 4=airsoft gun
 

we decided to play first one to 3 and here are my recollections of the night   

1st hole and the golfers played through with no caddys as the caddys went and lurked onto the second hole to get into posistion, as the second hole began most of the caddys were drinking and completley forgot about the game untill a short burst of an airhorn laid seige on our ears and my golfer began to scream as he was getting blasted by an onslaught of paintballs so me (caddy 4 of team roid rage) and caddy 1 went to assist our golfer as our other caddys went to attack team ij and the salamis. We reached our golfer and as i laid ropes down onto the air horn blasting SOB my other caddy flanked him and proceeded to pummel him with boxing gloves as i played protection for my golfer from the treeline.as i was laying down cover for my golfer i got kicked over by mr.bicycle and i was incapacited due to the fact that i just got snuck up upon by a fat guy on a 10 speed.the win of this round went to the strong salamis.   

2nd hole was an upset as roid rage and imperial justice went to war on eachother and stong salami won quickly.   

3rd hole i was pretty smashed already i dont remember much after this point except that as i me and mr. tennis ball laid seige on the salamis golfer our golfer played a near perfect hole and we won quite effectively.   

4th hole imperial justice used all the caddys as a perimeter for there golfer and he got the win even after an all out seige trying to break there defenses, by this point we are all beaten,bloodied and bruised.   

5th hole the strong salamis was a bicycle stick massacre as he was whacking running down the golfers untill one of the ips took a large stick and stuck it into the spoke causing a near fatal accident the ips got the win.   

6th hole Ips with only 3 caddys somehow managed to get the win   

it was a great night that wouldnt have happened if it werent for your crazy ideas. we all thank you ! and youtube videos will be up after the next match.







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